Tony Beals is the VP of Admissions and Enrollment Solutions at Brightmont Academy. Tony has extensive experience as both a parent and an educator working with students from an array of backgrounds including those with anxiety, depression, ASD, ADHD, and ODD. He has been in the education industry for over 25 years and has been involved as a teacher, consultant, manager, and leader.
I Was Smart. I Just Didn’t Seem to Fit. A personal journey beyond the label
Tony Beals • August 27, 2025
When I think back to elementary, middle, and high school, one word comes to mind: survival.
I was impulsive, unfocused, forgetful. I often missed assignments—not because I didn’t care, but because I literally couldn’t keep track. I struggled socially, too. I had a few close friends, but for some reason, I always felt like I was on the outside looking in—trying to fit in, but never quite belonging. I got bullied between classes, especially in middle school, and many mornings I was too sick with anxiety to move. I had to fake being sick just to stay home.
At the time (this was the 70's and 80's) there wasn’t language like “neurodivergent” to help me make sense of it all. ADHD was the only word people used—and it came with stigma, side-eyes, and medication warnings. I didn’t want to be that kid, so I put on the mask. No one wants to be that kid—the one who's too much, too loud, too forgetful, too weird. It’s a lonely place, and over time, you start to lose your own sense of self—becoming what you think everyone needs instead of who you actually are and end up being a “social chameleon.”
I tried to blend in, to stay quiet, to avoid the kind of attention that felt more like judgment than help. But the impulsivity still crept out from behind the mask—and I paid the price for it. Shame. Frustration. Disappointment. Every time I slipped, it just reinforced the idea that I wasn’t enough.
In 7th grade, Instead of taking Latin, I ended up in remediation—grouped into reading class alongside students whose challenges were different from mine (mostly behavioral). We didn’t share the same needs, but we were treated the same. It was a wake-up call. I didn’t belong there, but no one was asking why. No one was helping me figure out how I learned best. I was just trying to survive in a system that didn’t know what to do with me.
So, I had to figure it out myself. No help. No roadmap. No diagnosis that made sense. No Neuropsych. No Therapist. No IEP.
I learned to adjust. I paid close attention to what worked. I taught myself how to work with my brain, not against it. One thing I found was when I talked to myself while I worked and talked through my writing even, it created a happy place between the speed of my brain and the slowness of my mechanics.
I went from remedial English to Grade level English to AP Literature in my senior year—and scored very high on the exam. I discovered that resilience, self-awareness, and determination could carry me where others said I couldn’t go.
College? Some people had told me I probably wouldn't go (my closest friends knew though). Sometimes by people I trusted. But I knew better by then.
I had learned how to fight for myself, how to advocate, how to plan, how to bounce back when things didn’t go right the first time. I stopped trying to earn my worth by being like everyone else and started building a path that worked for me. I still got knocked down, still experienced struggle, but knew how to bounce back. I always bounced back.
I still had challenges. But now I had tools. Now I had hope. And for the first time, I wasn’t just surviving—I was growing.
And I wasn’t alone. I remember the people who believed in me—especially Ms. St. Claire, my English teacher. She always encouraged me. She worked with me patiently to help organize my thoughts and strengthen my voice. She saw something in me I couldn’t yet see in myself. She told me I was a good writer, and more than that—she meant it.
She believed it before I ever did. And that changed everything.
💡 3 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me
If you’re supporting a student like I once was, here are three things that would’ve made all the difference:
- Ask how they learn best — not just how they're doing. Most struggling students have strengths—they just don’t fit the mold.
- Don’t mistake anxiety or withdrawal for laziness. Shame and fear often hide behind missed assignments.
- Praise effort and strategy, not just results. Executive functioning takes work. Reward the work.
🧠 A Note to Educators & Parents
To the adults in the room: You may be the only person who sees the hidden brilliance in a kid who’s struggling. Your patience, your curiosity, and your belief in them might be the thing they remember ten years from now—when they finally start to believe in themselves.
✍️ Reflection Prompt
Think back to when you were in school— Was there a time you felt misunderstood? How might that experience help you show up differently for a young person today?
Why I’m Writing This Newsletter
I’m sharing this because I know I’m not the only one. I work with students every day at Brightmont Academy who are walking versions of my younger self—intelligent, anxious, misunderstood. And I want this space to be a place of encouragement, insight, and strategy for those who are helping students like I once was.
Each issue of this newsletter will dive into something different—whether you’re an educator, a parent, or a student yourself. I’ll share research, practical advice, and personal stories. I will explain, empathize, and advocate. Sometimes I may talk about what’s happening at Brightmont. And sometimes I’ll share pieces from my upcoming book, where I go even deeper into this journey.
I wore the mask for a long time. But I’ve learned there’s strength in unmasking—when it’s safe, when you’re supported, and when someone finally sees you for who you are. That’s what I want this space to be: a place where the mask can come off. Where brilliance doesn’t have to come at the cost of belonging.
Because if I’ve learned anything, it’s that the problem was never my intelligence. It was the system’s lack of imagination. And that’s where you come in.
Let’s change that—together.
Written by Tony Beals, VP at Brightmont Academy and author of the “Table Topics with Tony” newsletter and the upcoming book, The Education Paradox.© 2025 Tony Beals.
Thanks for reading 𝗧𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗧𝗮𝗹𝗸𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗧𝗼𝗻𝘆. This article reflects my original writing and lived experience. Feel free to share the link, but please don’t republish or copy the content without permission.
© 2025 Tony Beals. All rights reserved.
More Blog Posts + News
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Private School in Birmingham Specializing in One-to-One Instruction for 1st-12th Grade Students Birmingham, MI — Brightmont Academy’s Birmingham campus has officially relocated to a larger and more modern facility to meet the growing demand for its one-to-one instructional model. Brightmont Academy, a private accredited school offering one-to-one instruction, outgrew its previous location on Woodward Avenue and has moved into a significantly expanded space designed to support more students and educators. The new campus features double the number of classrooms compared to the former building, creating a more spacious and serene environment for learning. According to Annette Looser, Campus Director at Brightmont Birmingham, the response from the community has been overwhelmingly positive. “Every new family who has visited us so far has loved the space,” said Looser. “It is a very calm and welcoming environment with twice as many classrooms as our former location. We have had a lot of new families from the area enroll their students in our summer programs, and we expect to keep up with the demand we are receiving so far for full-time students this fall.” The additional square footage not only allows Brightmont to serve more families but also to hire more educators from the surrounding area. The school’s nationally accredited one-to-one instruction model has proven especially effective for students who need individualized attention, including those who have struggled in traditional classroom settings. “The increase in square footage will allow us to help more families that want to enroll their students for the fall,” Looser said. “It will also allow us to employ more teachers from the area.” Brightmont has served thousands of students nationwide through its unique approach to learning, which pairs each student with a dedicated teacher in every subject. With this new location, the school reaffirms its commitment to making education personal, flexible, and successful for every learner. “I thrive on helping people succeed, so my dream for the new location is to help as many families as possible who need a new school environment for their child, especially parents who feel desperate or who have students who are avoiding school,” Looser added. Brightmont Academy is located at 746 E Maple Rd. in Birmingham and is currently accepting enrollments. Families and professionals are invited to attend an Open House event on Thursday, August 21, 2025, between 8:00 AM and 4:00 PM. Brightmont Academy is an accredited private school that provides one-to-one instruction. One experienced teacher works with one student throughout every learning session. Customized full-time programs and individual courses are offered for grades 1-12. Students can also receive individualized tutoring for all 1-12 subjects, study skills, and test prep. Brightmont Academy has served thousands of students since 1999 and has 20 campuses in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, and Washington. For more information call 1-888-521-0887 or visit: www.brightmontacademy.com . Watch our video: Brightmont Academy - The One-to-One Flexible school - 1st through 12th
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Private School in Northfield Specializing in One-to-One Instruction for 1st-12th Grade Students Northfield, IL — Brightmont Academy, a private accredited school offering one-to-one instruction, is proud to recognize science and math instructor Gillian Buckardt, who has been with the school for the past two and a half years. Known for her compassion, dedication, and belief in the power of one-to-one education, Gillian has become a vital part of the Brightmont community. She first discovered Brightmont through a recruiter who encouraged her to apply. “I was a recent graduate at the time, and the role called to me—when I was in high school, I attended a similar one-to-one school that helped me tremendously during a difficult time. I wanted to give that positive experience back to other young people,” she shared. Brightmont’s one-to-one approach allows teachers like Gillian to meet students exactly where they are, both academically and emotionally. “The one-to-one learning method truly lets the student shine and thrive in a classroom built just for them. It removes so many barriers from effective teaching, and I’m able to meet the student directly where they're at in their life,” she explained. For Gillian, the impact of this method is best reflected in her students’ growth. One of her first students came to Brightmont after struggling to get accommodations following a disabling injury. “She had an abounding passion for science, and we nurtured that spark in an environment where she could heal at her own pace,” Gillian shared. “After a year of excelling, she moved to a new school and confidently presented her research at a science fair. Even now, she still returns to Brightmont for tutoring and stays in close touch—it’s been an honor to see her grow.” What makes Brightmont special, Gillian says, is the sense of connection. “I simply love the community of Brightmont. There is something wonderful that grows from working on a small campus and being able to build such strong relationships between staff and students.” Brightmont Academy is honored to have educators like Gillian Buckardt, who go above and beyond to ensure every student has the support, attention, and encouragement they need to thrive. Brightmont Academy is located at 1799 Willow Road in Northfield and is currently accepting enrollments. Families and professionals are invited to attend an Open House event on Thursday, August 21, 2025, between 9:00 AM and 4:00 PM. Brightmont Academy is an accredited private school that provides one-to-one instruction. One experienced teacher works with one student throughout every learning session. Customized full-time programs and individual courses are offered for grades 1-12. Students can also receive individualized tutoring for all 1-12 subjects, study skills, and test prep. Brightmont Academy has served thousands of students since 1999 and has 20 campuses in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, and Washington. For more information call 1-888-521-0887 or visit: www.brightmontacademy.com . Watch our video: Brightmont Academy - The One-to-One Flexible school - 1st through 12th
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